Craigslist gold digger gets pwned

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy.
I’m not from New York . I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’t think I’m overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.

it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 432279810



THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as “articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful”
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way.
Classic “pump and dump.”
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.

FBI posting fake links to child porn. You click, you get raided

A new technique to catch people looking for child pornography online has been approved by the courts and has already been used in three states. It involves posting bogus links to illegal videos that automatically triggers an armed raid on the user.

Doctoral student Roderick Vosburgh was caught this way last year. Agents got him to come outside after asking him about his car. He faces 10 years behind bars, a lifetime ban on being a college instructor, and 15 years as a registered sex offender.

Vosburgh's lawyer said, "I thought it was scary that they could do this. This whole idea that the FBI can put a honeypot out there to attract people is kind of sad. It seems to me that they've brought a lot of cases without having to stoop to this."


















Cooch's perfect criminal record in jeopardy

The wasabi's on me!!!

BoSox settle pay dispute, to go to Japan (AP)

Boston Red Sox General Manager Theo Epstein walks past luggage waiting to get loaded for a trip to Japan prior to a scheduled baseball game against the Toronto Blue Jays in Fort Myers, Fla., Wednesday March 19, 2008. The Boston Red Sox refused to take the field for their final spring training game in Florida on Wednesday and threatened to boycott their flight to Japan for their season openers unless their coaches and other staff are paid for the trip.

Fans at City of Palms Park were ready for Boston's final spring training game in Florida. The Red Sox weren't. In an extraordinary move, Boston players voted to boycott a nationally televised exhibition and Wednesday afternoon's flight to Japan for next week's season-opening series against Oakland, upset that coaches weren't going to receive the same $40,000 payments negotiated for players by their...

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Lighting is everything...

March 14th: Steak & BJ day

Hope all our male fans today don't end up like this guy:

Billy Crystal

What's next? Stephen King getting to bat for the Red Sox?

Detroit hotel receives glowing reviews

Might be worth visiting if you hate yourself.

As soon as we walked into our room we were greeted by a rat, mice running in all directions and the largest sized cockroaches we have ever seen.

Worst Way to Lose a Game: The Candidates

Barton vs. Winona State college basketball game

Plano East vs. John Tyler HS football game

HS basketball chick "butt shot"

My vote goes to Plano East.

Cooch, feel free to add to this list as you see fit.

Canes 7, Maine 4

CORAL GABLES, Fla. - Sophomore third baseman Mark Sobolewski drove in a season-high five runs in going 3-for-5 with a three-run homer and sophomore right-hander Anthony Nalepa won his second game in relief as No. 5 Miami won its sixth in a row by defeating Maine, 7-4, Wednesday night at Mark Light Field. Sophomore reliever Kyle Bellamy earned his first career save after tossing a scoreless ninth inning for the Hurricanes who improved to 11-1.

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Rocco Baldelli, CFer, DL

Dude plays for the DL more than he does the Rays...

Rays CF Baldelli to start season on DL (AP)

Tampa Bay's Rocco Baldelli will begin the season on the disabled list because of a condition that the 26-year-old outfielder says leaves him extremely fatigued after short workouts. Baldelli has been sidelined since last May because of lingering hamstring problems and has appeared in just 127 of 486 games the past three seasons because of an assortment of injuries.

Speaking of Ferocious Bears...

A bigger issue in the U.S.?

1) Subprime/credit crisis
2) Corruption in U.S. Gov't

A flip of the coin to me...

It's that time of year again

L&C's college baseball teams go at it: UM vs. UM

Representing Lavinius is the University of Miami Hurricanes. Repping Sir Cooch is the University of Maine Black Bears.

First pitch is Wednesday night (tomorrow) at 7:00 pm eastern standard time. Those in the Miami area are welcome to join Lavinius at Mark Light Field on the UM campus in beautiful Coral Gables. It's not everyday one gets a chance to meet a blogger of either Lavinius or Cooch's caliber, so if you're in the Miami area, or Alaska for that matter, don't miss this opportunity.

It won't be difficult to spot me. Just look for the best looking guy there. :)

Kawika Mitchell= the man

"Hit Tom Brady as much as you can. Don’t matter if it’s a penalty. You gotta get in the guy’s face."

Quite possibly my favorite Buffalo Bill

Sox Scout Arrested for Jerking Off at Hotel Window

"Hello housekeeping, you need squigi?"


Palm Beach Post Staff Writer

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

PORT ST. LUCIE — A Boston Red Sox scout was arrested, accused of masturbating at the window of his hotel room in front of two women and two underage girls at the swimming pool, records show.

Jesse Levis, 39, faces two felony charges for committing lewd and lascivious acts in front of children under the age of 16.

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UPDATE: Sports Talk Show host weighs in

John Henderson

Hey Cooch, how would you like to line up across this guy?

Spicy Cock Soup