Thursday, February 21, 2008
Monday, February 18, 2008
Saturday, February 16, 2008
USS Lavinius
The USS Lavinius (NCC-2758) was a Loknar-class (mark II subclass) Federation frigate starship in the 23rd century, entering Starfleet service on reference stardate 2/0111. The Lavinius was named for the star system Lavinius, and was declared lost on stardate 2/0902. (RPG reference book: Federation Ship Recognition Manual)[reference: star trek wiki]
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Bush's Economic Stankulus, errr Stimulus Plan
"Hey, let's give our taxpayers some cash to blow so our economy will get all stimulated and shit."
- George W. Bizzush
AOL.com poll of ~136,000 people said they will do the following with this new windfall (# of respondents in parenthesis):
Ah, you mean that most people aren't even going to buy new stuff? What kind of economic stimulus plan is this?!
- George W. Bizzush
AOL.com poll of ~136,000 people said they will do the following with this new windfall (# of respondents in parenthesis):
I'll pay bills: 50% (67,525)
I'll save it: 19% (25,450)
I'll go shopping: 15% (20,595)
I'm not getting a rebate: 9% (12,313)
Other: 7% (10,078)
Ah, you mean that most people aren't even going to buy new stuff? What kind of economic stimulus plan is this?!
Clemens is Toast
Going forward, questions will focus on Clemens more than McNameeBy Lester MunsonESPN.com
Updated: February 13, 2008
During Wednesday's hearing on Capitol Hill, which lasted more than four hours, members of the U.S. House of Representatives Committee on Oversight and Government Reform interrogated Brian McNamee and Roger Clemens about their irreconcilable stories concerning McNamee's work as Clemens' trainer. The questions, the answers and newly disclosed evidence raised the possibility of future criminal investigations and charges. Here are some of the questions and their answers:
Did the hearing produce any evidence that could cause problems for Roger Clemens?
Yes. Clemens and his team of lawyers and crisis management experts should worry about two developments in the hearing.
First, Clemens had no solid answer for the devastating testimony and written statement from Andy Pettitte...
Second, Clemens and his legal team blundered into the possibility of a charge of tampering with a witness...
[the rest]
Friday, February 08, 2008
Schilling WTF?
Ok...so he signs an incentive laden $8M deal for '08 and everybody's dancing in the streets. Now it comes to light that he has a potentially serious shoulder problem that could potentially wipe him out for the season, thus ending his career?
I'm still trying to make sense of this. He said on his blog that before he signed the contract, he passed the Sox physical exam. At what point in time between the contract signing and now did he eff up his shoulder?
The L&C diary demands answers dammit!
I'm still trying to make sense of this. He said on his blog that before he signed the contract, he passed the Sox physical exam. At what point in time between the contract signing and now did he eff up his shoulder?
The L&C diary demands answers dammit!
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Monday, February 04, 2008
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Patriots are not the best ever
Before the Patriots rolled along, Miami coach Don Shula always complained whenever another team was mentioned as the league's best ever. But running the table and going unbeaten is often the result of a fortunate break (the schedule) or a determined team relying on focus.
To me, domination is only complete when the playoffs are finished and the best team wins. Every team's best season is when it hoists the Lombardi Trophy. For the legendary Packers team, it was when they actually hoisted Vince Lombardi onto their shoulders.
1. 1984 San Francisco 49ers: Bill Walsh had two great teams in this decade, but this one finished the regular-season 15-1, outscoring opponents by 248 points. In the playoffs, the 49ers dominated two of the NFC's very best teams — future Super Bowl winners — in the Giants and the Chicago Bears. Granted, this team didn't have Jerry Rice yet, but it had a super defense — better talent than New England's today — with a secondary led by Hall of Famer Ronnie Lott that included Eric Wright, Dwight Hicks and Carlton Williamson. The front line had Fred Dean, Gary "Big Hands" Johnson and Dwaine Board. These 49ers throttled Dan Marino, who had thrown a then-record 48 touchdowns in the regular season, in Super Bowl XIX. They sacked him four times and intercepted him twice. On the 49ers side, Joe Montana passed for three touchdowns and a young running back named Roger Craig scored three times.
2. 1992 Dallas Cowboys: This was the first of Jimmy Johnson's back-to-back Super Bowl teams. Yes, they lost three games during the regular season, but they were super impressive in the playoffs, whipping a 14-2 Niners team in San Francisco for the NFC title, and then demolishing Jim Kelly and the Buffalo Bills 52-17 in Super Bowl XXVII. These Cowboys were powerful on both sides of the ball, and offensive tackles Mark Tuinei and Erik Williams (maybe the best lineman of his generation not in the Hall of Fame) protected Troy Aikman and opened holes for Emmitt Smith. Cornerback Kevin Smith had the talent to shut down Jerry Rice, too.
3. 2007 New England Patriots: We're assuming they whip the Giants and go 19-0. My only reservation with calling them the best ever is that they were fortunate to play six games in a woefully weak AFC East. Unlike the 49ers and Cowboys, who had quality division foes and strong conference opponents, the Patriots whipped their division foes by a margin of 153 points, with a league-record 589 points. Heck, the best quarterback they faced in the AFC East might have been Bills rookie Trent Edwards. The Patriots' greatest accomplishment was beating six playoff teams during the regular season while unleashing a passing offense featuring Randy Moss, Wes Welker, Jabar Gaffney, Ben Watson, Donte' Stallworth and Kevin Faulk. If you think the Chargers beat up on Brady last Sunday, both the 49ers and Cowboys had better defenses. The Patriots haven't seen a back seven as talented as San Francisco's in 1984.
4. 1985 Chicago Bears: When you think of characters, you think of this team. It was full of great talkers and one of the greatest football players ever in Walter Payton, who didn't score in the Super Bowl because Mike Ditka had this thing for Refrigerator Perry. This was a very unique team in that Ditka was the head coach, but a lot of the defensive players followed Buddy Ryan because of what his innovative 46 defense allowed them to do. Yes, they went 15-1 and demolished the out-numbered New England Patriots in the championship game, but they really didn't face a lot of great quarterbacks that season and the ones they did, they simply destroyed. Yes, they beat Montana and Phil Simms (although windy conditions in Soldier Field has something to do with that), but they faced someone named Dieter Brock in the NFC title game.
The rest...
To me, domination is only complete when the playoffs are finished and the best team wins. Every team's best season is when it hoists the Lombardi Trophy. For the legendary Packers team, it was when they actually hoisted Vince Lombardi onto their shoulders.
1. 1984 San Francisco 49ers: Bill Walsh had two great teams in this decade, but this one finished the regular-season 15-1, outscoring opponents by 248 points. In the playoffs, the 49ers dominated two of the NFC's very best teams — future Super Bowl winners — in the Giants and the Chicago Bears. Granted, this team didn't have Jerry Rice yet, but it had a super defense — better talent than New England's today — with a secondary led by Hall of Famer Ronnie Lott that included Eric Wright, Dwight Hicks and Carlton Williamson. The front line had Fred Dean, Gary "Big Hands" Johnson and Dwaine Board. These 49ers throttled Dan Marino, who had thrown a then-record 48 touchdowns in the regular season, in Super Bowl XIX. They sacked him four times and intercepted him twice. On the 49ers side, Joe Montana passed for three touchdowns and a young running back named Roger Craig scored three times.
2. 1992 Dallas Cowboys: This was the first of Jimmy Johnson's back-to-back Super Bowl teams. Yes, they lost three games during the regular season, but they were super impressive in the playoffs, whipping a 14-2 Niners team in San Francisco for the NFC title, and then demolishing Jim Kelly and the Buffalo Bills 52-17 in Super Bowl XXVII. These Cowboys were powerful on both sides of the ball, and offensive tackles Mark Tuinei and Erik Williams (maybe the best lineman of his generation not in the Hall of Fame) protected Troy Aikman and opened holes for Emmitt Smith. Cornerback Kevin Smith had the talent to shut down Jerry Rice, too.
3. 2007 New England Patriots: We're assuming they whip the Giants and go 19-0. My only reservation with calling them the best ever is that they were fortunate to play six games in a woefully weak AFC East. Unlike the 49ers and Cowboys, who had quality division foes and strong conference opponents, the Patriots whipped their division foes by a margin of 153 points, with a league-record 589 points. Heck, the best quarterback they faced in the AFC East might have been Bills rookie Trent Edwards. The Patriots' greatest accomplishment was beating six playoff teams during the regular season while unleashing a passing offense featuring Randy Moss, Wes Welker, Jabar Gaffney, Ben Watson, Donte' Stallworth and Kevin Faulk. If you think the Chargers beat up on Brady last Sunday, both the 49ers and Cowboys had better defenses. The Patriots haven't seen a back seven as talented as San Francisco's in 1984.
4. 1985 Chicago Bears: When you think of characters, you think of this team. It was full of great talkers and one of the greatest football players ever in Walter Payton, who didn't score in the Super Bowl because Mike Ditka had this thing for Refrigerator Perry. This was a very unique team in that Ditka was the head coach, but a lot of the defensive players followed Buddy Ryan because of what his innovative 46 defense allowed them to do. Yes, they went 15-1 and demolished the out-numbered New England Patriots in the championship game, but they really didn't face a lot of great quarterbacks that season and the ones they did, they simply destroyed. Yes, they beat Montana and Phil Simms (although windy conditions in Soldier Field has something to do with that), but they faced someone named Dieter Brock in the NFC title game.
The rest...
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
My Janitor is Pissed
The janitor for my organization is tired of cleaning-up after slobs. He left the following message in the kitchen (bwhahahhahahah):
The Health Industry is on top of things
Way to break new ground guys!
Getting in shape reduces death risk
By CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, Associated Press Writer Tue Jan 22, 9:32 PM ET
DALLAS - The more fit you are, the longer you're likely to live, according to a large study of veterans that applies to black men as well as white men. The Veterans Affairs researchers found that the "highly fit" men in the study had half the risk of death as those who were the least fit. Being "very highly fit" cut the risk even more, by 70 percent.
In other news, Neil Armstrong lands on the moon, Abraham Lincoln dead at 56
Getting in shape reduces death risk
By CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, Associated Press Writer Tue Jan 22, 9:32 PM ET
DALLAS - The more fit you are, the longer you're likely to live, according to a large study of veterans that applies to black men as well as white men. The Veterans Affairs researchers found that the "highly fit" men in the study had half the risk of death as those who were the least fit. Being "very highly fit" cut the risk even more, by 70 percent.
In other news, Neil Armstrong lands on the moon, Abraham Lincoln dead at 56
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Heath Ledger Dead at 28
NEW YORK (CNN) -- Actor Heath Ledger was found dead Tuesday of a possible drug overdose in a Lower Manhattan apartment, the New York Police Department said.
Heath Ledger was found dead in his Manhattan apartment.
The Academy Award nominated actor was 28.
"Pills were found in the vicinity of the bed," police spokesman Paul Browne told CNN.
"This is being looked at as a possible overdose, but that is not confirmed yet."
"This is being looked at as a possible overdose, but that is not confirmed yet."
Ledger was found by a housekeeper who had gone to wake him for an appointment with a masseuse in the Soho apartment, Browne said.
He was declared dead at about 3:30 p.m., Browne said.
In 2005, the actor played Ennis Del Mar in "Brokeback Mountain," about two cowboys who had a secret relationship.
The role earned him the Oscar nomination.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Shout out to a new L&C fan!
I hit the recruiting trail over the weekend seeking out new fans of our little hidden gem here on the blogspot (well, not really, but it sounds good to put it that way).
While on the trail, I was able to secure the fandom of one Victoria Baxter Nuzzi. You can just refer to her like I do as "Vikki." She's a second or third cousin of Lavinius (I believe our grandparents were first cousins...but if you're reading this Vikki, feel free to reply and clear this matter up once and for eternity). :)
She becomes either the 6th or 7th fan of the L&C diary. We hope to be at 10 fans by the end of the year, and 20 fans by the end of the decade. Lofty goals, I know, but when there's a will, there's a way...
Let's all give a big L&C welcome to Vikki!
While on the trail, I was able to secure the fandom of one Victoria Baxter Nuzzi. You can just refer to her like I do as "Vikki." She's a second or third cousin of Lavinius (I believe our grandparents were first cousins...but if you're reading this Vikki, feel free to reply and clear this matter up once and for eternity). :)
She becomes either the 6th or 7th fan of the L&C diary. We hope to be at 10 fans by the end of the year, and 20 fans by the end of the decade. Lofty goals, I know, but when there's a will, there's a way...
Let's all give a big L&C welcome to Vikki!
Opening Day begins in Japan with Red Sox playing A's
BOSTON -- Red Sox fans will have to get up early to watch the World Series champions start their title defense.
The major league season opener against the Oakland Athletics in Tokyo will start at 6:07 a.m. EDT on March 25, the Red Sox said Wednesday. The teams also play the following day.
Ahead of Opening Day, the Red Sox play the Central League's Hanshin Tigers at Tokyo Dome on March 22 (11:07 p.m. EDT March 21) and the Yomiuri Giants on March 23 (6:07 a.m.).
The major league season opener against the Oakland Athletics in Tokyo will start at 6:07 a.m. EDT on March 25, the Red Sox said Wednesday. The teams also play the following day.
Ahead of Opening Day, the Red Sox play the Central League's Hanshin Tigers at Tokyo Dome on March 22 (11:07 p.m. EDT March 21) and the Yomiuri Giants on March 23 (6:07 a.m.).
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Banned in the U.S.A.
Man this takes me back! Cooch used to rock out to these guys growing up on the mean streets of Lisbonia.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
24 posts!
I am pleased to announce that we have hit the 24 post plateau and it's only January 15th.
To give L&C fans a point of reference, last year we didn't have our 24th post of the year until August 22nd!
L&C has started '08 fast out of the blocks. We have no intention of slowing down. Enjoy the content!
Signed,
L of L&C
To give L&C fans a point of reference, last year we didn't have our 24th post of the year until August 22nd!
L&C has started '08 fast out of the blocks. We have no intention of slowing down. Enjoy the content!
Signed,
L of L&C
Mancrush V.2 adding some meat on them bones!
CHESTNUT HILL, Mass. -- The wiry frame is now right up there with the no-hitter when it comes to Clay Buchholz. It's just a memory.
The Red Sox's top pitching prospect took the organization's mandate of adding strength to his gifted right arm during the offseason seriously. And it was a noticeably sturdier Buchholz that worked out at Boston College on Tuesday as part of the Red Sox 2008 Rookie Program, a two-week event that ends on Friday.
"I know what it's going to take for me to have to stay on the team this year," said Buchholz. "A lot of hard work and dedication goes into being prepared for 162 games and that was my offseason this year, that was [what] I put all the dedication toward. I think I'm right at 191 [pounds] right now actually. It's better than the 178 I was last year."
Full story
Monday, January 14, 2008
And now, another priceless pep talk for Archie's elder seed
"Bummed about that loss? Wish you had another shot to knock off the undefeated Patriots? Understandable. But don't sweat it. You're still the reigning Super Bowl champ. Yeah, you know it. You're the man. But only for 20 more days. Then you're crap again. So live it up."
And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:
"Throw another tipped pass that was intercepted in the red zone? Too bad. Here's what you need to do: Work on your accuracy. Maybe watch a game tape of Tom Brady for some tips. That guy went 26-for-28. He's awesome. Plus, watching him is easy on the eyes. Total dreamboat."
And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:
"So I hear you're upset about losing at home in the divisional playoffs. Worried people are going to call you a choker again? Don't be. You played well. You just had a few bad breaks. And you were up against a buzz saw. That Billy Volek has never lost in the playoffs. He's a dynamo."
And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning
And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:
"Throw another tipped pass that was intercepted in the red zone? Too bad. Here's what you need to do: Work on your accuracy. Maybe watch a game tape of Tom Brady for some tips. That guy went 26-for-28. He's awesome. Plus, watching him is easy on the eyes. Total dreamboat."
And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning:
"So I hear you're upset about losing at home in the divisional playoffs. Worried people are going to call you a choker again? Don't be. You played well. You just had a few bad breaks. And you were up against a buzz saw. That Billy Volek has never lost in the playoffs. He's a dynamo."
And now, another priceless pep talk for Peyton Manning
Dear Tony Romo
Stop dating celebrities.
Signed,
Those concerned for Tony Romo's career
P.S.- plenty of high quality low-profile snatch out there to get you off just as good as a celeb.
Signed,
Those concerned for Tony Romo's career
P.S.- plenty of high quality low-profile snatch out there to get you off just as good as a celeb.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Message to Peyton Manning
TURN DOWN A COMMERCIAL!
This message has been paid for and sponsored by people who can no longer stand seeing Manning's ugly mug.
This message has been paid for and sponsored by people who can no longer stand seeing Manning's ugly mug.
Bill Walton= GOAT
As annoying as Bill Walton can be, the man is also incredibly witty.
On KIA NBA Shootaround, they asked Walton, Screamin' A., and Jalen Rose who they thought could beat San Antonio.
Jalen Rose says, "Phoenix."
Walton questions, "Phoenix? Why Phoenix? Are they still paying you?"
Jalen replies, "Yes. Under the table."
And Walton quips, "Just like at Michigan."
On KIA NBA Shootaround, they asked Walton, Screamin' A., and Jalen Rose who they thought could beat San Antonio.
Jalen Rose says, "Phoenix."
Walton questions, "Phoenix? Why Phoenix? Are they still paying you?"
Jalen replies, "Yes. Under the table."
And Walton quips, "Just like at Michigan."
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Celtics match best start in franchise history
EAST RUTHERFORD, N.J. (AP) - The Boston Celtics' big three all had big nights against the New Jersey Nets.
In the end, it was the Celtics' reserves that came up big in the fourth quarter in Boston's 86-77 win, the 30th of the season for the NBA's top team.
"We got down on the road and our starters needed some rest," Celtics coach Doc Rivers said. "The bench was able to dig it out and get us the win. They were huge for us. Every game, we try to get our big guys rest because its a long season and were trying to give the bench more confidence."
Kevin Garnett had 20 points and 11 rebounds, Paul Pierce added 18 points and Ray Allen scored 16 as Boston (30-4) matched the 1959-60 champion Celtics for the best start in franchise history.
[full story]
In the end, it was the Celtics' reserves that came up big in the fourth quarter in Boston's 86-77 win, the 30th of the season for the NBA's top team.
"We got down on the road and our starters needed some rest," Celtics coach Doc Rivers said. "The bench was able to dig it out and get us the win. They were huge for us. Every game, we try to get our big guys rest because its a long season and were trying to give the bench more confidence."
Kevin Garnett had 20 points and 11 rebounds, Paul Pierce added 18 points and Ray Allen scored 16 as Boston (30-4) matched the 1959-60 champion Celtics for the best start in franchise history.
[full story]
Friday, January 11, 2008
Division 1 college basketball team held to 20 points in a game! Are you friggin kidding me?!
When unprecedented suckage levels are attained, we at the L&C diary are compelled to share these findings with our readers.
The St. Louis University Billikens (whatever the sixth letter a Billiken is) were held to 20 POINTS in a Division 1 college basketball game.
We're not talking 'bout division 2, 3, 9, 10, high school, junior high, or elementary school. We're talking Division 1 college basketball.
Some lowlights for SLU:
*7 total first half points
*12% shooting from the field/floor in the first half
*14.6% shooting from the field/floor for the game
*5.3% shooting from 3-point land
*5 points from their leading scorer
My word! They could house all the homeless people in New Orleans with all them bricks!
A big THANK YOU goes out to the St. Louis University Billikens for reminding us that despite the world we live in, we still haven't seen it all.
Box score
The St. Louis University Billikens (whatever the sixth letter a Billiken is) were held to 20 POINTS in a Division 1 college basketball game.
We're not talking 'bout division 2, 3, 9, 10, high school, junior high, or elementary school. We're talking Division 1 college basketball.
Some lowlights for SLU:
*7 total first half points
*12% shooting from the field/floor in the first half
*14.6% shooting from the field/floor for the game
*5.3% shooting from 3-point land
*5 points from their leading scorer
My word! They could house all the homeless people in New Orleans with all them bricks!
A big THANK YOU goes out to the St. Louis University Billikens for reminding us that despite the world we live in, we still haven't seen it all.
Box score
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Rice shafted on Hall of Fame voting... Again.
BY THE NUMBERS: 382 -- The number of home runs hit by Sox outfielder Jim Rice during his 16-year career, which was tops among AL hitters during that span.
Seriously, isn't it time to get over the fact that he spent a good deal of time being a douche bag? His numbers speak for themselves. He's a Hall of Famer.Clemens and McNamee UNEDITED 17 min phone convo
Props to the WEEI website. Enjoy L&C fans!
WARNING: Explicit language for all our young viewers out there. Please consult mommy or daddy before listening.
What do you want me to do?
WARNING: Explicit language for all our young viewers out there. Please consult mommy or daddy before listening.
What do you want me to do?
Monday, January 07, 2008
Rocket Roger files defamation suit!
Took long enough for one of the accused to step up to the plate (or in Rocket's case, the rubber)
McNamee: "I'll go to jail for you!"
Roger: Not before you go to court for me!
McNamee: "I'll go to jail for you!"
Roger: Not before you go to court for me!
Sunday, January 06, 2008
More fun with blondes
Going to Orlando?
There was a blonde who had been planning a trip to Orlando for almost a year. She had saved her money and was determined to take this trip. Nothing or no one was going to stand in her way of enjoying something that had taken her so long to plan.
When she boarded the airplane, she settled herself into a first-class seat. It wasn't long until another passenger tapped her on the shoulder and told her she was in his seat.
She adamantly replied, "I am blonde. I have saved for over a year for this trip to Orlando and I am traveling first-class. I will not move." The other passenger complained to the flight attendant. The flight attendant walked up to the blonde and politely asked her to please move to the coach seat that was assigned her.
The blonde again said, "I am blonde. I have saved for over a year for this trip to Orlando and I am traveling first-class. I will not move." The flight attendant stalked up to the Captain and calmly told him what had happened. He said he would handle it.
The Captain leaned over the blonde and whispered in her ear. She immediately gathered her things and hurriedly moved to the back of the airplane.
Both the other passenger and the flight attendant looked at each other in disbelief, and the flight attendant asked the Captain exactly what was it he said that settled this disagreement so readily.
He smiled and replied, "I simply told her the front of the plane was not going to Orlando."
There was a blonde who had been planning a trip to Orlando for almost a year. She had saved her money and was determined to take this trip. Nothing or no one was going to stand in her way of enjoying something that had taken her so long to plan.
When she boarded the airplane, she settled herself into a first-class seat. It wasn't long until another passenger tapped her on the shoulder and told her she was in his seat.
She adamantly replied, "I am blonde. I have saved for over a year for this trip to Orlando and I am traveling first-class. I will not move." The other passenger complained to the flight attendant. The flight attendant walked up to the blonde and politely asked her to please move to the coach seat that was assigned her.
The blonde again said, "I am blonde. I have saved for over a year for this trip to Orlando and I am traveling first-class. I will not move." The flight attendant stalked up to the Captain and calmly told him what had happened. He said he would handle it.
The Captain leaned over the blonde and whispered in her ear. She immediately gathered her things and hurriedly moved to the back of the airplane.
Both the other passenger and the flight attendant looked at each other in disbelief, and the flight attendant asked the Captain exactly what was it he said that settled this disagreement so readily.
He smiled and replied, "I simply told her the front of the plane was not going to Orlando."
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Moved to Maine
Aug 12 - Moved to Maine. It is so beautiful here. The hills are so serene and beautiful. Can hardly wait to see snow cover them. God's country...I love it here.
Oct 14 - Maine is the most beautiful place. The leaves are turning all different colors, I love the shades of red and orange. I went for a ride through the beautiful country side and spotted some deer, they are so graceful certainly they are the most peaceful animals on earth. This must be paradise, I love it here.
Nov 11 - Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such an elegant creature. The very symbol of peace and tranquillity. Hope it will snow soon...I love it here.
DEC 2 - It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed in white, it looks like a post card. We went outside and cleaned the snow off of the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight, (I won) and when the snowplow came by, we had to shovel the driveway out again. What a beautiful place. Mother nature in perfect harmony... I love Maine.
DEC 12 - More snow last night. I love it. The snowplow did his trick again (that rascal). Winter wonderland... I love it here.
DEC 19 - More snow last night. Couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work this time. I'm exhausted from shoveling. Fuckin snowplow...
DEC 22 - More of the white shit fell last night. I've got blisters on my hands from all this damn shoveling. I think the snow plow man hides around the corner and waits till I'm done shoveling my driveway...asshole!
DEC 25 - "White Christmas" my busted ass! More friggin snow. If I ever get my hands on that son-of-a-bitch who drives that snow plow, I swear I'll castrate that dumb bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt this fuckin ice.
DEC 28 - More white shit fell last night. Been inside since Christmas Day, except for shoveling out the driveway after "Snow Plow Harry" comes by, that prick...God damn car is behind a ton of snow. The weatherman said to expect another 10 inches of white shit tonight. Do you know how many shovels of snow 10 inches is?
Jan 1 - Happy Fuckin New Year. The weatherman was wrong (again). We didn't get 10" last night, we got 34", stupid ass weatherman anyway. At this rate it won't melt before the 4th of July. The snow plow got stuck up the road and the shithead had the balls to come to the door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him I've broken 6 shovels already, shoveling all the shit; he pushed into my driveway, I broke the last one over his fuckin head.
Jan 4 - Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food, on the way back a God damn deer ran in front of me. I hit the bastard and tore my car all to hell. Did $3,000 in damages. Those fuckin beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed all of them last November.
May 3 - Took the car to the garage in town. Would you believe the thing rotted out from all the fuckin salt they keep dumping all over the road. Car looks like a piece of shit.
May 10 - Moved back to Florida, I can't imagine why anyone in their right fuckin mind would ever want to live in this godforsaken place called Maine.
Oct 14 - Maine is the most beautiful place. The leaves are turning all different colors, I love the shades of red and orange. I went for a ride through the beautiful country side and spotted some deer, they are so graceful certainly they are the most peaceful animals on earth. This must be paradise, I love it here.
Nov 11 - Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such an elegant creature. The very symbol of peace and tranquillity. Hope it will snow soon...I love it here.
DEC 2 - It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed in white, it looks like a post card. We went outside and cleaned the snow off of the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight, (I won) and when the snowplow came by, we had to shovel the driveway out again. What a beautiful place. Mother nature in perfect harmony... I love Maine.
DEC 12 - More snow last night. I love it. The snowplow did his trick again (that rascal). Winter wonderland... I love it here.
DEC 19 - More snow last night. Couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work this time. I'm exhausted from shoveling. Fuckin snowplow...
DEC 22 - More of the white shit fell last night. I've got blisters on my hands from all this damn shoveling. I think the snow plow man hides around the corner and waits till I'm done shoveling my driveway...asshole!
DEC 25 - "White Christmas" my busted ass! More friggin snow. If I ever get my hands on that son-of-a-bitch who drives that snow plow, I swear I'll castrate that dumb bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt this fuckin ice.
DEC 28 - More white shit fell last night. Been inside since Christmas Day, except for shoveling out the driveway after "Snow Plow Harry" comes by, that prick...God damn car is behind a ton of snow. The weatherman said to expect another 10 inches of white shit tonight. Do you know how many shovels of snow 10 inches is?
Jan 1 - Happy Fuckin New Year. The weatherman was wrong (again). We didn't get 10" last night, we got 34", stupid ass weatherman anyway. At this rate it won't melt before the 4th of July. The snow plow got stuck up the road and the shithead had the balls to come to the door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him I've broken 6 shovels already, shoveling all the shit; he pushed into my driveway, I broke the last one over his fuckin head.
Jan 4 - Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food, on the way back a God damn deer ran in front of me. I hit the bastard and tore my car all to hell. Did $3,000 in damages. Those fuckin beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed all of them last November.
May 3 - Took the car to the garage in town. Would you believe the thing rotted out from all the fuckin salt they keep dumping all over the road. Car looks like a piece of shit.
May 10 - Moved back to Florida, I can't imagine why anyone in their right fuckin mind would ever want to live in this godforsaken place called Maine.
Friday, January 04, 2008
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Sunday, December 30, 2007
New England Patriots go 16-0*
* Cheating aside, they did win 16 games. Awesome, eh?
OK, Patriots get caught for cheating against the Jets.
NFL responds with, "That's wicked bad. However, we won't make the Patriots forfeit the game, because Las Vegas bettors would probably kill us. Integrity aside, let's just fine the Patriots. OK? Great."
Pats finish year undefeated. I put an asterisk on that one. Bullshit.
OK, Patriots get caught for cheating against the Jets.
NFL responds with, "That's wicked bad. However, we won't make the Patriots forfeit the game, because Las Vegas bettors would probably kill us. Integrity aside, let's just fine the Patriots. OK? Great."
Pats finish year undefeated. I put an asterisk on that one. Bullshit.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Cooch wins the 2007 FFL Championship!!!
Championship Game Co-MVPs:
Kurt Warner and Anquan Boldin
Postseason Trivia:
Postseason Trivia:
Cooch's squad, Runningmen Down, was the only team to score at least 100 points in all of their postseason games.
Runningmen Down 2007 Team MVP:
Clinton Portis
Clinton was consistent all season long and pivotal in the postseason, posting 20+ points in the last 2 games.
Final Standings:
Monday, December 24, 2007
Lisbon Falls UPS!!!
I can't believe it! Lisbon Falls is small, but I didn't realize it was THIS SMALL. UPS just delivered a package to me and I can't believe the UPS "truck" the "driver" used - it's a bicycle with a cart attached! Holy. Shit. This is a slideshow of the UPS Man at the next house on his route. Unbelievable.
Friday, December 21, 2007
"The Dog Ate My World Series Ball!"
File this one into the WTF files...
ESPN.com news services
Updated: December 20, 2007, 12:16 PM ET
The baseball from the final out of the 2007 World Series is at Jonathan Papelbon's home in Hattiesburg, Md., according to the Hattiesburg American.
Well, part of it is.
The rest? You should ask the Boss.
If he could talk, he might say it was delicious. But the most he'll say is "woof."
"Boss," you see, is Jonathan Papelbon's dog. Boss likes to play with baseballs. And Boss found the baseball that Red Sox catcher Jason Varitek gave the closer after he struck out the Rockies' Seth Smith to clinch Boston's second World Series title in four years, the newspaper reported.
----
What's with this team and World Series balls? And if this load of poo is true, how is this ball anywhere near striking distance of poochie?
ESPN.com news services
Updated: December 20, 2007, 12:16 PM ET
The baseball from the final out of the 2007 World Series is at Jonathan Papelbon's home in Hattiesburg, Md., according to the Hattiesburg American.
Well, part of it is.
The rest? You should ask the Boss.
If he could talk, he might say it was delicious. But the most he'll say is "woof."
"Boss," you see, is Jonathan Papelbon's dog. Boss likes to play with baseballs. And Boss found the baseball that Red Sox catcher Jason Varitek gave the closer after he struck out the Rockies' Seth Smith to clinch Boston's second World Series title in four years, the newspaper reported.
----What's with this team and World Series balls? And if this load of poo is true, how is this ball anywhere near striking distance of poochie?
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
lavinius vs. cooch: head-to-head matchup #3 this season
FFL Playoffs, Round 2: Cooch beats Lavinius comfortably. Romo, who Cooch traded to Lavinius several weeks ago, puts up 3 points and pulls down Lavinius' squad with him. Cooch advances to the Championship game, facing a 5-8 team (Team Cherry), who pulled an even greater upset (ala Joe Namath) against the Tainted Taints.
(click on image for greater detail) Sunday, December 16, 2007
Good Job Eli Manning, you Douche Bag
Just in case you didn't know - I'm not much of an Eli Manning fan...
How about this line from today (Washington Redskins vs. New York Giants):
Yup. 36 incomplete passes. Nice job, douche.
How about this line from today (Washington Redskins vs. New York Giants):
Cooch to Romo: Next time, leave Jessica at home
The Rex Grossman award goes to.... Tony Romo!
With his bubbly girlfriend in the stands, Tony Romo played an absolute stinker in Irving today against the Eagles. The Eagles held Romo to the worst QB rating of his career (22.2, ouch!) as Romo threw 3 picks with no TDs; the Eagles won 10-6 and Romo was off all day...
[box score - very unimpressive]
[box score - very unimpressive]
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Sunday, December 09, 2007
Dallas Cowboys Clinch NFC East!
Rob Phillips - Email
DallasCowboys.com Staff Writer
December 9, 2007 3:19 PM
DETROIT - The Cowboys have clinched their first division title since 1998, but not without a large dose of drama.
Quarterback Tony Romo's 16-yard touchdown pass to Jason Witten with 18 seconds left capped an amazing fourth-quarter comeback and lifted Dallas (12-1) past Detroit, 28-27, to secure the NFC East title Sunday at Ford Field.
Detroit (6-7) appeared to have preserved the upset with 5:47 left, when Greg Blue recovered Witten's fumble at the Lions' 1-yard line. But the Cowboys got the ball back, allowing Romo just enough time for a game-winning drive.
Witten finished with a game-high 15 catches for 143 yards, and Romo completed 35 of 44 passes for 307 yards and two touchdowns.
Running back Marion Barber also had three touchdowns for Dallas.
DallasCowboys.com Staff Writer
December 9, 2007 3:19 PM
DETROIT - The Cowboys have clinched their first division title since 1998, but not without a large dose of drama.
Quarterback Tony Romo's 16-yard touchdown pass to Jason Witten with 18 seconds left capped an amazing fourth-quarter comeback and lifted Dallas (12-1) past Detroit, 28-27, to secure the NFC East title Sunday at Ford Field.
Detroit (6-7) appeared to have preserved the upset with 5:47 left, when Greg Blue recovered Witten's fumble at the Lions' 1-yard line. But the Cowboys got the ball back, allowing Romo just enough time for a game-winning drive.
Witten finished with a game-high 15 catches for 143 yards, and Romo completed 35 of 44 passes for 307 yards and two touchdowns.
Running back Marion Barber also had three touchdowns for Dallas.
Sunday, December 02, 2007
NFL Week 13 Picks
LAVINIUS: Lavinius Lock and Load Play of the Week
Denver -3 over Oakland (buy the 1/2)
-Denver 5 SU wins over Oakland last 5 H2H
-Denver 4 SU wins in Oakland last 4 in Oakland
-Oakland 1-4 SU at home this year
-Denver has scored 95 pts in their last 3 games (a little over 31 per)
-Oakland allows 153.6 rushing ypg (Denver rushes for 124 per game)
-Cutler is playing his best ball of the season
Denver over Oaktown! Buy the hook!
COOCH: Cooch's Lead Pipe Lock
NY Giants -1 (buy the hook, god dang it!) over Chicago
- Chitown sucks and has just lost Benson....
- Giants leader in all major facets: Pts/game, yards allowed, yards gained, time of possession, red zone, kicking, and penalties.
- Giants 6-2 ATS last 8 road games
- Bears 3-9 ATS last 12 vs NFC
LAVINIUS: Dental Floss Lock of the Week
Ravens +21 over NE (purchase el hooko):
Brady will get the shits eating at Phillip's Crab Shack the night before
and drink too much at Power Plant Live. He will sleep with one too many
girls, including a transvestite inadvertantly, and smoke a half a dozen
blunts with John Curtice while receiving head under the table from said
tranny.
COOCH: Action Play Cock Lock Consensus Pick 50 Dime Play of the Week GOLD Star Release
ST LOUIS -3 OVER ATL
Last great thing out of ATL was 50 Cent. No, wait, was that Lil' John?
LAVINIUS: Ratings Buster Cement Beam Lock of the Decade in Odd-Numbered Years
Miami -1 over Jets
Phins win, '76 Bucs champagne shower ensues.
Denver -3 over Oakland (buy the 1/2)
-Denver 5 SU wins over Oakland last 5 H2H
-Denver 4 SU wins in Oakland last 4 in Oakland
-Oakland 1-4 SU at home this year
-Denver has scored 95 pts in their last 3 games (a little over 31 per)
-Oakland allows 153.6 rushing ypg (Denver rushes for 124 per game)
-Cutler is playing his best ball of the season
Denver over Oaktown! Buy the hook!
COOCH: Cooch's Lead Pipe Lock
NY Giants -1 (buy the hook, god dang it!) over Chicago
- Chitown sucks and has just lost Benson....
- Giants leader in all major facets: Pts/game, yards allowed, yards gained, time of possession, red zone, kicking, and penalties.
- Giants 6-2 ATS last 8 road games
- Bears 3-9 ATS last 12 vs NFC
LAVINIUS: Dental Floss Lock of the Week
Ravens +21 over NE (purchase el hooko):
Brady will get the shits eating at Phillip's Crab Shack the night before
and drink too much at Power Plant Live. He will sleep with one too many
girls, including a transvestite inadvertantly, and smoke a half a dozen
blunts with John Curtice while receiving head under the table from said
tranny.
COOCH: Action Play Cock Lock Consensus Pick 50 Dime Play of the Week GOLD Star Release
ST LOUIS -3 OVER ATL
Last great thing out of ATL was 50 Cent. No, wait, was that Lil' John?
LAVINIUS: Ratings Buster Cement Beam Lock of the Decade in Odd-Numbered Years
Miami -1 over Jets
Phins win, '76 Bucs champagne shower ensues.
Saturday, December 01, 2007
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
